For many, happiness is tied to achieving specific goals—buying a dream home, losing weight, earning more money, passing the bar exam, finding the perfect partner, landing a dream job, or finally starting a family. While these milestones can certainly bring joy, would a single achievement truly provide lifelong happiness?
Merriam-Webster defines happiness as "a state of well-being: joy." Yet, true happiness isn’t a fixed destination; it’s a journey, a mindset, and a practice that evolves over time.
Rethinking Happiness: Insights from 10% Happier
In 10% Happier: A Practical Approach to Finding Real Happiness, Dan Harris challenges the idea that happiness is an all-or-nothing state. After experiencing a nationally televised panic attack, he embarks on a journey into mindfulness and meditation, realizing that happiness isn’t about eliminating struggles or forcing positivity. Instead, it’s about responding to life with greater clarity, resilience, and self-awareness.
Harris' book offers a practical, relatable perspective, proving that even a small shift in mindset—just 10%—can make a noticeable impact on overall well-being. His insights reinforce the idea that happiness is something we cultivate rather than something that happens to us.
How to Find and Cultivate Happiness
Happiness isn’t a one-time event—it’s a series of daily choices. It’s found in small, meaningful moments, in self-awareness, and in the ability to appreciate life as it is right now.
1. Redefining Happiness
Many people chase happiness as if it’s something they will attain once they reach a certain goal. "I’ll be happy when I lose weight, find love, make more money, or retire." But happiness isn’t in the future—it’s in the present.
Happiness is deeply personal; what brings joy to one person may not resonate with another. That’s why defining happiness on your own terms is essential rather than adopting someone else’s version of success.
2. Practical Steps to Find Happiness
Happiness is already within you—you just have to uncover it. Here’s how:
Practice Gratitude
The more you focus on what’s good in your life, the more happiness grows. Instead of immediately checking the news or social media when you wake up, start your morning by thinking of three things you’re grateful for. Better yet, write them down in a journal. Return to those thoughts of being grateful throughout your day. Add in some moments of taking time to breath, with three breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth in a sigh. You can even take a moment to thank yourself for taking that moment of pause to breath.
Embrace Mindfulness
Being present helps you experience life fully rather than getting lost in worries about the past or future. Take three minutes each day to focus on your breath. Inhale deeply through your nose and exhale through your mouth like a sigh, repeating this for five breaths. Then, simply be—no thoughts, just a moment of stillness.
Do What You Love
Engage in activities that make you feel alive, whether writing, traveling, painting, fostering a dog or cooking. If you’ve never explored a creative hobby, take one small step—watch a watercolor painting tutorial on YouTube, read a travel blog, or join a Facebook group like Solo Women Travelers Over 50. Or taking a bigger step - like if you want to cook or bake something different - buy the ingredients for a new recipe and set them out as a reminder to start.
Surround Yourself with Positivity
The people and environments around you influence your happiness. Take a look at your inner circle—do they uplift you or drain you? Sometimes, we unconsciously stay in negative environments because they feel familiar. But familiarity doesn’t mean we have to stay stuck. Choose relationships and spaces that bring peace.
3. Allowing Happiness into Your Life
We often block happiness by holding onto guilt, fear, or limiting beliefs. Just because something has always been a certain way doesn’t mean it has to stay that way.
Here are some steps to open the door to joy:
Let Go of Perfectionism: Happiness isn’t about having a perfect life—it’s about embracing imperfections and enjoying the journey.
Forgive and Release: Holding onto resentment or self-judgment creates emotional blocks. Letting go allows happiness to flow freely.
Say Yes to Joy: Many people postpone happiness, believing they don’t deserve it yet. But you don’t need to earn happiness—it’s available to you now.
The Ripple Effect: How Happiness Transforms Your Life
When you prioritize happiness, everything shifts. Your health improves, relationships deepen, and even success follows. Happy people attract opportunities, make better decisions, and inspire others around them.
Happiness is also contagious. When you radiate joy, you uplift those around you, creating a ripple effect that spreads positivity far beyond your own life. Even if your closest friends or family tend to be negative, what if you became the one who shifts the energy? By focusing on positivity, you can break the cycle and bring light into the lives of others.
Final Thoughts
Happiness isn’t something to chase—it’s something to cultivate. When you shift your mindset, embrace the present, and open your heart to gratitude and love, happiness follows naturally. And the best part? You don’t have to wait for it. Happiness is here now, waiting for you to welcome it in.
Disclaimer:
The information in this blog is for general guidance and inspiration only. If you are experiencing depression, anxiety, or any other mental health condition, or if you are in an unsafe situation, please seek professional help.
There are many compassionate and skilled professionals, including therapists, counselors, and medical practitioners, who can provide the support and care you deserve. Additionally, there are excellent charities and organizations dedicated to helping individuals through difficult times.
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger or crisis, please reach out to a trusted professional, call a helpline, or seek medical assistance. You are not alone, and there is help available for you.
Copyright Notice:
The use of this article is restricted without written permission from Wend Cole. Unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or use of this content is strictly prohibited. For inquiries regarding usage rights, please contact Wend Cole directly.
Finding happiness is an inside job.
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